Chapter LX: Snake vs. Metal Gear D

Snake falls into this room, where Fox taunts him one last time. "There is no way to destroy this Metal Gear!" he says, in direct contrast to the fucking inventor who only told you moments ago that you have to attack the legs of Metal Gear to destroy it. Nice try, Fox.

Why would the inventor of a machine delude himself into thinking it was vulnerable - wouldn't you delude yourself into thinking the opposite? Well, Fox is going on and on about how great Metal Gear is, but this video game would be pretty dumb if you actually couldn't kill Metal Gear, so...

"Nah, you know what? I'm good here, thanks."

We're getting close to the final fight. And of course, since no video game lets you get away with killing the last boss only once, that means this final fight precedes about eleven more.

Just to make sure, yeah, we still have Marv's MSX cartridge with the Oilix plans. Hey, where do you think scientists store research and theses? On paper? Or hard drives? Nah. Video games, baby! Hawking's latest formulas are all on his X-Box hard drive, next to his DOA Volleyball savegames. I hear he's almost got Christie the Venus!

Head into the east room to get grenades! You get three guesses - what weapon do you think you need to kill this boss?

Go into the south room to get B2 rations - the only rations that don't neutralize acid puddles or lure poison hamsters out of lockers. Congratulations, you've got the most normal items in the game!

And finally... it's time to enter the door...


(He's got a penis, by the way.)

And just so you know, this is the only thing Fox says before the fight. It begins...