Chapter XIV: The Aftermath of the Running Man Saga

Patience wins out as Running Man runs over landmines and becomes a brown corpse. Ironically, had he not been running and just tried to shoot me or something, this boss fight would probably have been a lot harder.

Let that be a lesson. Never rely solely on fastness - make sure your talents are real words. And like, try not to run on landmines.


Well, this snake poops landmines, that's why! Actually, since a cheetah and a snake aren't really enemies in the wild, I don't find it that inconceivable that a landmine-pooping snake could beat a cheetah... who ran around in a room full of nerve gas.

Touche, douche! I think someone just laid down a zing mine!

Whoa! That zing was so sharp, Running Man's body just exploded! Wow. I wonder what would have happened if Snake had said something funny.

Running Man leaves behind ID Card #3. You can use it to open this door and find...

Children! Those bastards were keeping children in a room next to an ex-sprinter! I hope he wasn't doping them!

"Hey boss? Where do you want all those missles moved to?"

"Well, put 'em in the room with those two kids for now. I'm a good daddy!"

I'd like to point out that after this, the game makes you go back through the swamp... AGAIN. I hate this fucking invisible maze swamp.

Head back to the fortress and use your new card to acquire Stinger missles. Unlike Metal Gear Soild and... well, life... you don't need something to launch missles - you can just throw them really hard at stuff.

Now head back to the squeaky sand desert. Notice this guard is confused. He's probably thinking, "Why did we import this sand that makes squeaky sounds when people walk on it? Why did I join such a retarded army?"

Boss fight comin' up! You ready?!